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Fly
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*Now I feel like putting this up.
Life is a lot like a path. You have to chose which way your going and how your going to live with that decision. However, once you've abandoned that other path, you could go back; it just feels a little silly to turn back around and do it all over again.
For me, I've always based a decision on either dumb luck, or work my way through my own stupidity. That's not the way I want to live at all. I have to base it on my guts and how I feel inside. I just never knew how I felt inside. I've based my ideas and thoughts to please my own family, instead of what I want. Then again, I've become so blinded that I don't know what to think anymore. I've struggled with thinking for myself... But no more. No more sheepish behavior. No more silence or blindly agreeing with people.
My dad and I were talking a couple days ago about my future and where I truly want to be in life. We started talking about what seems more "comfortable" for me. As I thought of selling comic books my whole life, I thought, "was it really something I wanted to do"? Just sit around, thinking of ideas, just to sell them? Sure I'd be supporting my family and being happy with myself... But is that truly how I felt? Then I thought of my youth.
I liked to draw, write, and think of different ideas but sometimes I get tired of doing just that. It's nice to sketch ideas and draw figures randomly though, but there are so many things in life that I want. To be powerful, strong, brave, and heroic, is something that I've pined for. To get strong, to get knowledgeable about the world, but most importantly, to travel. I want to see the world.
As a little girl, I loved to travel. During my childhood, leaving the house for vacation was like a special privelege. I've gone camping in Utah, beach bummed in California, and traveled across several states with my family. We slept in motels, hotels, and in our own car. We went to Denny's, Cracker Barrel, and Blue Berry Hill for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. It was a very personal trip that kept us closer as a family. Looking back, I want to do things like that all by myself.
Maybe if I took a job like that it would be great... Or maybe...
Just to fly. Just to fly through the purple sky without being scared would be a wonder.
Categories: Thoughts
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5 Comments
Your not that old Les. You'll always be youthful to everybody. I'm sure this is something I want to do. That or be a jet pilot (I REALLY don't want to be afraid to fly). If I don't make the cut, I'm going to make it work. I will make it work and I won't look back from it either.
Thanks Uncle Les
I wanted to go to the Air Force Academy(about the time Top Gun was a blockbuster) I applied too.....almost made it, but the national average for SAT scores jumped dramatically higher that year and I missed the cut(and I had a combined score of 1400, too).....Now? I'm glad I didn't make it, as it turns out I have bouts of vertigo that likely would've killed me in a cockpit, so I was lucky there, right?
I wanted to become an animator at Disney Studios. I allowed my parents to talk me out of it.......and that's another itch I'll never get to scratch....grumble....
I wanted to be an international businessman traveling the world. I got a scholarship and accepted into a prestigious business program in college.....and 2 years later, changed my major since I discovered I hated the subject!(and, as it turns out....I've managed to travel all over the world on my own without the business degree, so that part of the goal was accomplished).
I wanted to be an entertainer. I wanted to make people happy. At one point, I was going to be a stage magician.....yeah...that never went beyond being able to do a half-way decent party show for 12..... I wanted to be a movie star.....didn't have the looks or acting ability...... I wanted to be a rock star.... I was in 4 working bands through college and learned a lot about NOT succeeding as a rock star, but playing a lot of rooms that had chicken wire in front of the stage(One of the reasons I love The Blues Brothers so much LOL! I've played in Bob's Country Bunker-it just had another name....)
Then.....SUCCESS! I broke into the Piano Bar industry and never looked back. For 23 years, I've had one great performing job after another in dozens of good piano bars, 6 cruise ships, one touring band and now 7 years as a dueling pianist. Do I love my job? You bet your ass, I do! So my heartfelt advice is this:
Discover what it is that you absolutely love to do. What makes you the happiest and gives you a tremendous amount of satisfaction while you're doing it? If you figure that out, then move Heaven and Earth to discover a way to do it that will support you as a career. If you can, then you'll always do a great job in your career and be very content doing it, my friend. Good luck. Peace.
EDIT: And I promise to come back and love to show you guys what I've been doing there too
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