Manic Expression

Hello and welcome to In Too Deep, where I over-analyse a certain section of pop culture.

Well I'm reading Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality (a really good piece of fan fiction, I suggest you check it out) and they were talking about the Patronus Charm. Basically for those not in the know, you think of a happy memory and cast the charm, with the resulting silver-glowing animal being a way of fighting off Dementers (aka the physical manifestation of depression). So what would other characters have as their patronus? Well, lets find out.

Batman: A giant bat. Okay I'm not gonna lie, some of these are going to be painfully obvious and I'm not gonna explain my reasoning behind them.

Superman: A human being. Why that? Well mostly because Superman believes that human beings have the ability to do great good, with most of him happiest memories revolving around being on Earth. Thus he'd have a human patronus to prove that humans are good.

Spider-Man: Spider.

Doctor Who: A non-animal example, assuming he could accept magic, then he'd somehow make his TARDIS his patronus because he will still rationalize science over magic. Plus it's a glowing silver TARDIS. It'd be awesome.

Captain Kirk: I'm gonna say lion. I know it's clichéd to say that he's 'lion-hearted', but he's a Gryffindor man and he'd suit the lion well.

Captain Picard: A rooster. From memory it's the national animal of France in some sport or another (never ask me to source my crazy facts), and a rooster is a dignified animal probably. So he'd choose it.

Aladdin: A monkey. Need I elaborate?

Jafar: A snake. Big surprise I know.

Goku: Bit of a difficult one this, but I'd imagine it'd have to be something like a dog. Loyal, playful, silly. That sums up dogs and Goku to a tee.

Vegeta: A tiger, or some other large cat to show off both his strength and his prideful nature.

Lex Luthor: Himself. Yes the man is so egotistical even his patronus is just himself. Only with hair.

Sherlock Holmes: A bloodhound. Not that Holmes would ever do something as inconsequential as magic, but if he did he'd have a bloodhound since they too like to sniff out clues. Plus he has a loyal companion that helps him out many a time (no not Watson, Toby, and this reference is so obscure I wonder how many will be able to name the book).

Marvin the Paranoid Android: He doesn't need one. He's already miserable enough, the Dementers won't be able to make him any more so. Life! Don't talk to him about life.

Captain America: A bald eagle. Do I need to say why?

Flash: The clichéd cheetah, since it is the faster animal alive.

Aquaman: Some sort of Lovecraftian monstrosity only found at the depths of the ocean because Aquaman controls all sea life, so he knows what's down there. He knows more about the monsters we've yet to see and just how to make them a patronus. Not that he'd need one anyway.

The Green Hornet: Gonna go out on a limb and say that perhaps, just maybe, he'd choose a hornet.

The Joker: I don't know, but I really don't think I'd want to see it.

Catwoman: What? It's hard coming up with this many original characters, never mind the patronouses I have to put on top of that. She's got cats by the way.

Cinderella: A mouse. Not sure if a mouse would be all that effective, but she does like the mice a lot.

Lady Tremaine: A cat. What's more thematic than that?

Maleficent: A dragon. Not that she'd ever feel fear and doubt when she's the most powerful thing out there.

Me: A spider-monkey. There's something endearing about an animal that doesn't seem to care about the laws of gravity and physics.

I could go on, but I'd be interested in hearing what other people could come up with (and what their own patronuses would be). If you disagree with anything, or have anything to add, feel free to leave a comment. Till next time.