Manic Expression

Hello and welcome to In Too Deep, where I over-analyse a certain section of pop culture.

Well I just finished reading the Alice in Wonderland... duology, I suppose (which I love because I'm a huge fan of high concept philosophy disguised as simple children stories) and did some research. Much to my surprise (well, not that much cos I did already know, but lets just say I was surprised), the Mad Hatter was a Batman villain. And I thought (as I so often so do) “What if other classic characters got to be villains?” So join me as I work out just who would be the next big guy to give Batman a bad day.

Well lets start off looking at literature in the public domain. One good bad guy would be Peter Pan, the loveable scamp. Give that boy rocket boots and the same psychopathic world view he has in the books (seriously he kills the lost boys, it's not said in the story but the author pretty much confirmed it). He is narcissistic and more then willing to do whatever it takes to get his own way. That's more then a match for Batman if he had to beat up the flying man-child in green tights. Or, from the Shakespearian era, Puck from A Midsummer's Night Dream (my favourite Shakespeare character). Either give him super-advance technology powers that make it look like he can do magic, or just give him the ability to do magic. Either way a trickster character with lots of power would be a fun character to read about against Batman. Lets not forget the Wicked Witch from The Wizard of Oz. Like Puck, having a female witch character would be an interesting twist on the Batman mythos (if they haven't already done it). They could give her fear gas and make her the female equivalent of Scarecrow. And finally we have Tarzan, who's probably already been a villain in the Silver Age comics. But he too would be great. So that's public domain literature characters, but there are others.

So that's the public domain characters. What about characters from more modern stories? Well right off the bat Voldermort fighting Batman would be something I'd pay to see. The man with no nose and awkward hugs fighting the Dark Knight himself. Since Batman doesn't normally go against magic users, it'd be interesting to see how it'd play out (as long as he avoids being hit by the Avada Kadava and dying again, because that'd be awkward). Or the White Witch, the more religious allegorical version of the Wicked Witch (since having Batman fighting a lion would probably raise too many complaints, even more if it was lion-Jesus). Artemis Fowl would be an interesting character because Batman's never gone up against an evil kid genius with a giant bodyguard (at least, I don't think he has). Plus Artemis Fowl is already a supervillian turned hero.

But lets stop beating around the bush and see what are some of the best (or worst) characters that could appear in a Batman comic. We all know the Mad Hatter is a huge fan of Alice in Wonderland, but what if he was created today? And found another piece of absurdest literature that is full of crazy things that don't make a lick of sense. Yes that's right, he'd become Count Sparkle. He'd cover himself in body glitter and try to be the shinier version of the Dark Knight, dazzling his enemies. He wooed woe young maidens and create a skin-tight shield that protects his body from being hurt. He'd also be a strict vegetarian that gains his powers from tofu.

(And if you don't know what book I'm talking about, go sit in a corner and be thankful for your ignorance).

But there is one other book that could provide interesting enemies for Batman to have to fight against. One that often gets plundered for morals and ideas, but not for the actual characters. And while it's probably been done before, who wouldn't want to see Batman fight off against Satan. Yes he barely appears in the Bible, but why should that stop him from being an interesting bad guy. Have someone that goes around convincing people he's actually Satan. Give him powers that help sell that illusion. It'd be an interesting story, since you would be placing Batman in an almost Jesus-like role.

Still, that's just my thoughts on the matter. If you have anything to add, or anything you disagree with, feel free to leave a comment. Till next time.