Manic Expression

At work, one of the only things that get's me through the day is that I don't have to listen to the cacophony of keys clacking, pens scribbling, or the voices of countless men and women chatting about their new born miracles (shut up! I know you love the little fuckers, but I bet they have have big heads and more wrinkles than a chow!). I get to listen to whatever my heart desires.

When I was first hired it was music. Pandora opened my eyes to tons of bands I didn't know about. Eventually, I gave one too many songs a 'thumbs up' and it thought I would enjoy more music from bands that have one good song. Guess what? I don't.

(You liked our cover of Sweet Home Alabama, that means you'll like our four album suit about cousin fucking, right?)

I went through people's Itunes shared folders and found some good music to listen to. Most people here don't have the same taste as me. Once the one or two people's music folders bored me, I looked to greener pastures...

That's when I discovered podcasts.

Science, humor, movies, history, medicine...comedians, celebrities, schmucks in their free time, anyone could have one! Some are stories, some are news, some let you know more about the wired world we live in. Some are even about eating snacks! There's more than one of them!

Alas, not many people know about these wonderful programs. The radio plays some of them in certain areas, but for the most part these guys are limited to assholes like me who are bored at work. Therefore, I'm under obligation to spread the word!

Actually, you're about to get a list of opinionated bullshit that I like. Here are the top five podcasts that I listen to that I think everyone should check out.

5. The Memory Palace

(Short stories for those short on time.)

This would be higher, but there hasn't been a new episode since March 25th, 2012. Did it stop? Did the guy die? What happened? I could try to research it but, eh.

With 44 episodes available, it's worth checking out. They're short (usually around five minutes) tales of strange occurrences. Not freaky or scary happenings, just...strange. Quaint might fit to. The entire catalog could be listened to in couple of hours, so it really isn't THAT time consuming.

4. Radiolab

(When you hear their voices, this is who you'll picture...even in your dreams...)

When I first heard this podcast, I thought I was going to hate it. The subjects they explore, and the stories within, seem to be so out there, they could only be bullshit. But, since it was produced by WNYC and distributed by NPR, I gave it a chance. I was glad to be proved wrong.

Yeah, the stories seem impossible, but they walk you through every step. They explore the people, the science, and in the end, they make sure to frame it in a relatable way. They weave wonderful, true life stories into something more than your typical drunken analysis.

(Zeppelin...he had much tighter riffs than anything today...and fuck you if you pull that Hendrix shit!)

Their discussions feel real. Each episode let's you take away what you want, whether it be a life lesson, or an entertaining hour.

3. Film Sack

(Little known fact: it's as dangers to talk about movies on the internet as it is to apply a circular saw to your nuts.)

These guys don't go looking for the best of the best, or the worst of the worst. What they go for are the in between. Those little gems that fall within the nether regions of Netflix Instant. Literally. They make sure the movie is on Netflix so that everyone can watch it with them. Sometimes, you, or they, may have seen the film, sometimes not. Either way, it's going to get 'sacked'.

Sometimes it's the little things that make people worth listening to.They know how to work a mic, they have very different opinions (personalities), and they don't hold back (except for f-bombs...sometimes). The show is well structured and very varied. They'll rip apart tropes, play funny clips, and even summarize the movie in a Twitter post (something I wish I came up with). It's one of the most entertaining podcasts I listen to.

2. Originz

(Don't forget the Zed!)

This was one of the first things I listened to when I got my job. I didn't know what I wanted to hear, but I knew I needed something varied to keep my attention. Little did I know that there was a soothing Australian voice looking to offer me something other than beer.

The premise is simple. A guy finds articles that he likes and he reads them to you. So what? My drunk uncle does the same thing at Thanksgiving, why should I listen to this?!? The stories are usually very niche. Every want to know the story of Vaseline? How about a list of extinct (or nearly extinct) colors? Want to know about killer sausages? Or maybe you want to see photos of a bizarre carpet of leaves on London streets? This show has it all.

Did I mention his soothing, sexy voice?

1. Skeptoid

(This is the mug of knowledge.)

You ever hear stories that people 'swear' to be true, but deep down inside, you know it's full of shit? You wish you could say something to your friend/lover/homeless person, but you just don't know what! Brian Dunning does it for you.

Each show is well researched and well argues. Dunning is a true skeptic. He let's the evidence be the judge. Even when the case is so clearly in his favor, so damning for his arguers, he won't say that something "certainly" is the case. If there's no primary sources, which he usually finds, he'll leave it as unresolved, but with a more 'probable' explanation. At between ten and fifteen minutes in length, he manages to examine what happened to the lost colony at Roanoke, explain why gluten free diets don't make sense, and even manages to scrape up some dirt on the fellows behind the 'Fire in the Sky' incident.

This man is my new hero. He says all the things I wish I could say. He's even handed, he doesn't insult his audience (usually anyway), and most importantly, he not boring.