Manic Expression

Greetings peasants. I am the most delectable thief- I mean -creature in all of the land Ms. Suave. Born from a cow and raised by a herd of roosters, I have single handedly, become one with the animal. When it comes to looting, killing, and sexting, the animalistic nature of Suave has made me a force to be reckoned with. In the animal world and the human world, I may add. However, we're all lovers here. You may call me Jaye Suave

After a brief period where I’ve been thinking where to go next with Mr Smooth, I suddenly had one of those “Bright Ideas”. How about a month devoted to the greatest actor to ever play the part of James Bond, that man of course being George Lazenby. Whilst my idolisation of Lazenby is in part meant to be ironic, I do legitimately enjoy his sole turn as James Bond in On Her Majesty’s Secret Service, and it’s his career following that film that I find to be the most...

I said in my last update on Up Late With Mr Smooth that I was planning to do a Christmas special but due to time constraints and a severe case of writer's block that never really came to pass. So instead I've gathered what ideas I've had and put them together to make today's blog, which I hope you will enjoy as much as I enjoyed writing it.

In this month’s instalment of “Whatever Happened To…” wewill be looking at the strange case of Mister Smo...

Rating: BLOOD, GORE AND OVER-THE-TOP FREUDIAN REBIRTHS. WHAT’S NOT TO LOVE?

I know I’m a bit late getting to it, but after his wonderful present to me, I’ve decided to devote myself to giving him an equally good present, but with about 70% less effort. I began of course by looking through his main body of work, which is all great by the way (that’s 10 dollars you owe me for that shameless plug), and I noticed (after rulin...

There's one man tangled up in the vast, crisscrossing interwebs that selflessly thrusts himself forth, day after day for the benefit of every man (and woman ['s vagina]), yet he's not as well noticed as some of these "Doctors" who "supposedly" help people. While these "specialists" have fancy medical degrees and "learn shit", they can't hold a candle to 85 years (give or take a generation, depending on who you ask) of proven experience. If you're having trouble fucking someone, and you need h...

So once again, I wasted my precious free time this weekend indulging in another marathon of movies, most of which were pretty excellent (bar one). I also went to a football match, but that isn't worth talking about because my team lost. Instead, let's talk about the 6 and a half movies that I watched this weekend, because this is a blog I always have a lot of fun doing and which usually gets a very good response. Without further ado, let's get this started;

THE K...

As most of you will have noticed, I haven’t really been doing many blogs recently, so I’m here to tell you all about my recent difficulties with writing Up Late with Mr Smooth. I personally think its different writing a wholly comedic blog to writing reviews, you constantly need to come up with new materials and new things to talk about, which is especially difficult with such a one note character as Mr Smooth. I mean, how many times can I joke about murdering my countless fiction...

If any of you read my last Breaking Character blog, you would have remembered me lavishing praise upon the original Crow film, which has definitely rocketed its way into my top 20 favourite films evar (which seems to be a weekly occurrence for me). But like everyone else, whenever I like a film, I’m always interested in seeing what the se...

One of the blogs that I have always really enjoyed doing is these ones where I basically binge on movies at the weekend and then just write a short little review of each one of them. I know it's not polished work of mine you'll ever read (although the term "polished" in reference to my blogs may be a tad charitable), but as I say, I enjoy doing them and you guys seem to be indifferent towards them so why not. So without further ado, let's talk about my weekend of movies, which included some c...

With the huge financial success of Pee-wee's Big Adventure and Beetlejuice, Tim Burton was able to get his next directional movie greenlit. A movie that would revolutionize a genre in a time in which they were presented in a colorful, campy way. This innovated, dark, and serious movie was the superhero classic Batman which debuted on June 23, 1989.

"All the world 's a stage, and all the men and women merely players. They have their exits and their entrances; And one man in his time plays many parts"

Good evening one and all, and welcome to the 20th edition of the much beloved Up Late With Mister Smooth. As this is such a special occassion, I, Winston St John Smythe have taken it upon myself to bring a slightly higher quality blog to you fine folk (as you...

At long last, I have returned to Manic Expression, to dole out relationship advice to you losers so that you can finally come out of your parent’s basements and start going and getting knee-deep in pussay (Only joking of course, I’m sure only about half of you still live in your parent’s basements). Of course, it is I, Mr Smooth, back to captain the good ship Up Late with Mr Smooth…of course. Apologies for my extended absence everyone, it’s just that I was arrest...

I can't really think of a good tagline for this one so...CRYING FREEMAN!

To quote Sir Ahnold Schwarzenneger in the awesometastic-looking "The Expendables 2", I'M BACK! Sorry everyone that I was away for so long but I was starting to feel a slight lack of enthusiasm for just about everything...

I'm going to break new ground today by being the first critic on the internet to review the Dark Knight.

*googles "Dark Knight Rises Reviews"*

*259,000,000 results*

FUCK! Yes, I know every single person on planet Earth has now seen and discussed The Dark Knight Rises, but I thought that seeing as I saw it for the first time today that I would give you all my view on what many people have claimed is o...

Hey there everybody, and welcome back to Smooth Manor for a very chilled out and relaxed edition of Up Late With Mr Smooth, with me...yeah we all know who I am. As some of you will know, I had a mildly successful pop career in the 1980's with my band Smooth Vocals. And by mildly successful I of course mean we reached number 3 in Switzerland, as well as charting at number 97 in the US Adult Contemporary Chart. Go us! But anyway, most of that success was based on my charm and good looks, as w...

"FRIENDS! WHY HAVE YOU SOLD YOUR SOULS TO THE DEVIL?!"

After some brief flirtations with brilliance, Super Sentai finally reached its peak in 1988 with one of the still most beloved series in the entire franchise, Choujuu Sentai Liveman (Beastman Squadron Liveman) and also my personal 2nd favourite series (that I've wat...

Hey there everyone and welcome back to another edition of Up Late With Mr Smooth, aka, the show whose schedule has gone right the fuck out of the window, with me, your humble host, Mr Smooth. If you didn’t know that already, please leave now. I must apologise that these blogs have been coming out less and less frequently but as most of you will know, I’m a very busy man, what with my constant court appearances, constant week long love-making sessions, as well as the fact that I ha...

Inside the human body, a mysterious power is hidden. With training and discipline, this infinite power can be obtained.

In most of my blog’s so far, I’ve had very clear feelings about just about every series, either good, bad or really bad (SUN VULCAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!), but Hikari Sentai Maskman is...

Have you ever watched a film that offended you on every single level? That took every moral value you have and raped it right in front of you? Well, I have experienced that feeling thanks to this piece of complete shit. I hate Alien Vs Predator 2. It isn't the worst film I've ever seen, that honour goes to the cinematic classic "Bear", but it is certainly the film I hate the most. I mean, "Bear" had an excuse, it was low-budget trash, this film was probably made on a multi-million budget with...

Hello one and all, and welcome back to Smooth Mansion with me, the Centurion of Coitus, the Governor of Gettin’ Down To Business, Mister Smooth. I know this dose of Smooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooth has been somewhat delayed, but I had very good reason! You see, my beloved cat Kitler died very suddenly when a former girlfriend of mine ran her over seventeen times in her Humvee. FUCKING WHOREFACED FUCKING WHORE BITCH CUNT! KITLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEER!!! I’m sorry, but it s...